The TROUGH -- The Maggie Beazer Hall of Swine's Official Newsletter

Issue 12

Pigs trot at Turkey Trot
Aaah, Thanksgiving. Pie, Feasts, Family, and the Erda Turkey Trot. The 2nd annual Erda Turkey Trot is Thanksgiving Day at 8a.m. It will start at the Nancy and Greg Folta residence. If you have ordered a t-shirt, you will notice that this year's shirts include a logo for M.B.H.O.S. Shirts aren't the only goodies that will be given out. After the Turkey Trot, muffins, breads, cider, and hot cocoa will be given out. There will also be prizes and a raffle. If you want to come, please bring a food items to support Zachary Scott's Eagle project. The M.B.H.O.S. is pleased to be a sponsor of the Thurkey Trot, and you should be excited to attend.


Cloud Nine Rocks it Out!
Do you like concerts? If you do, then come to the Cloud 9 concert on November 28th, 2008 at 7:30p.m. in the BYU Great room in Erda, Utah.
Admission: 75 cents adults 18-64
65 cents seniors >64-- front row seats
60 cents kids 13-17
50 cents kids 4-12
Children 3 and under free
For more information including refreshment list and souvenir availability and prices -- call (435)833-9865 and ask for details.


Thanksgiving Sale
The M.B.H.O.S. is having a Thanksgiving Day Sale! This is the perfect time to get memberships, take tours, and get subscriptions to The Trough. From now through November 27th, admission to the M.B.H.O.S. is 5 cents, memberships are 50 cents, and subscriptions are 15 cents. If you bring a donation of swine to the M.B.H.O.S., you get a free ticket to see Cloud 9 perform. This sale won't last forever, so trot on over to the M.B.H.O.S. for this great sale!


Notes and Notices for the M.B.H.O.S.

• Issue 11's joke contest has been extended to November 22nd at 10a.m. MT.
• Letters to The Trough can be mailed to 4336 Liddell Lane, Erda, UT 84074, or emailed to byubeaz@byu.edu, or put in the mailbox on Maren's desk, or comments on the Hog Blog.
• Ad space is available in the Trough.

Piggy Trivia

• a male pig is called a boar
• if a boar has had an operation so it cannot become a father, it is called a barrow
• a female pig needs to drink up to 11 gallons of water a day
• pigs have an excellent sense of hearing
• a mother pig has 14 teats -- or nipples -- 12 more than most human mothers
• Next issue's trivia -- "pig breeds"

Piggy Spotlight

This issue's piggy spotlight is on SNORT. Snort is a light-up pig keychain given to Maggie by Aunt Jeri. Recently Snort was lost, but he was found a few days later, but broken. Everyone thought that snort would never be a keychain again. Then repairs manager, Blake Beazer, drilled a hole in Snort's bottom and stuck a key chain in the end. Now Snort is fine and happy to be a keychain again.

Giggle Corner

Q: What do you get when you cross a pig and a Christmas tree?A: A porcupine.

Q: What is a pig's favorite fairy tale?A: Slopping Beauty.

Q: What is a crafty pig called? A: CunningHAM.

Q: What did the exasperated Jewish pig say? A: "Oink Vey!"

Q: What do you call a pig sold to the pawn shop?A: Ham-hock?

Q: What is a pig called who is pushed down a hill?A: A sausage roll?

Q: What's a pigs favorite ballet?A: Swine Lake.

Q: What do you call pigs that want everything?A: Gimme pigs.

Q: What do you call pigs that take everything?A: Hogs.

Q: What position do pigs play in baseball?A: Short-slop.

Q: What do the police do when they arrest a pig?A: They put him in hamcuffs.

Q: How did the police know when the farmer stole the pig?A: The pig squeeled.

Q: What's black and white and pink all over?A: A pig in a tuxedo (a.k.a. a fine looking swine).

Q: Where do pigs like to sit at the play ground?A: On pork benches.

Q: What did the congressman pig visit Niagra Falls in?A: A pork barrel.

Q: What do you call a pig that takes acting lessons?A: A hamateur.

Q: Why did the bacon laugh?A: One of the eggs cracked a yolk.

Q: What was the joke that the girl egg told to the boy pig?A: I'm so hot, I'm practically bacon.

Q: What do you get if you cross a snake with a pig?A: A boar constrictor.

Q: What did the neurotic pig say to the farmer?A: You take me for grunted.

Q: A blonde is walking down the street with a pig under her arm. She passes a person who asks "Where did you get that?"
A: The pig says, "I won her in a raffle!"

Q. Why did the three little pigs decide to leave home?A. They thought their father was an awful boar.

Q: When were pigs made? A: In the Saus-Age

Q: What part in a Shakesperian play does a small pig get cast in?A: Hamlet.

Why is it that the first thing we try to do after killing a pig is to cure it?

Patient: Doctor, doctor, I've got a little sty.Doctor: Then you better buy a little pig.

The teacher was furious with her son.Teacher: "Just because you've been put in my class, there's no need to think you can act up and misbehave. You're a pig."The son said nothing.Teacher: "Well, do you know what a pig is?"Son: "Yes mom, the offspring of a swine."

Two friends who lived in the town were chatting.First friend: "I've just bought a pig."Second friend: "But where will you keep it? Your yard's much too small for a pig."First friend: "I'm going to keep it under my bed."Second friend: "But what will you do about the smell?"First friend: "Oh, I'm not too worried, he'll soon get used to it."

Son: Dad, that Mr. Jenkins down the road said you weren't fit to live with pigs!Dad: What did you say son?Son: I stuck up for you. I said you were certainly fit to live with pigs.

Customer: Waiter, this food isn't fit for a pig!Waiter: All right, I'll get you some that is.

A pig and a chicken were walking by a church where a gala charity event was taking place. Getting caught up in the spirit, the pig suggested to the chicken that they each make a contribution. "Great idea!" the chicken cried.
"Let's offer them ham and eggs?" "Not so fast," said the pig testily. "For you, that's a contribution. For me, it's a total commitment."

Jokes submitted by Brent Beazer of Erda, Utah.